Here are some examples of exactly how classy I am:
Once with a mouthful of coffee I had to cough, this was not by choice but compulsion. I spewed coffee all over my keyboard and computer screen at work. Try explaining that one as you clean it up.
I constantly trip over myself so it didn't help when one day as I was getting out of my car I turned my ankle luckily saving it before I fell on my face. There were people around and I realized it looked like I just exited my car looking drunk. I walked as soberly as possible (um, how do you do that?) until I was out of sight.
I have problems with too much phlegm (I know TMI) so when I'm clearing my throat out people think I'm sneezing (I've never understood that). I let them think that and I thank them.
When picking up my car from a regular maintenance service I "found" my car.
Dear woman in the drivers seat that I yanked the unlocked door open on,
I'm sorry and my maniacal laughter as I was walking away was recognizing that I had cracked.
Sincerely,
The woman that almost tried to sit in your lap.
Stopped at a red light I saw the turn lane had a green light. Started honking my horn furiously at the car in front of me because we could go. Stopped when I realized that we still had a red light. No I'm not in labor, having a heart attack, or legally blind. Proceeded to not look at anyone around me. Thankfully I was close to home.
This seems like it could become a multi parter...
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